Follow your happy!

A bereaved mothers journey

I recently heard this song for the first time when I was working graveyard at 3am, alone in the aisle stocking the baby food and tears fell down my face. This is just like Allie Leigh Gledhill. I know at 25 she thought she had time to get herself together. I prayed with my daughter when she prayed to Jesus for forgiveness & salvation. I know she believed Jesus was God but she got herself bound up in chains messing with a drug that opens herself up to the demonic. The devil has tormented me with the false teaching of you can lose your salvation, putting images in my mind that my daughter is in Hell. This has been The Valley of the Shadow of Death with me. I HATE RELIGION!! It has tortured me!! God gave me Allison, I prayed to get pregnant with her! I had to have an operation to get pregnant with her. I taught her who Jesus was constantly & when she understood she prayed with me and got saved & baptized also. Surely my God would not give me Allison & then put her in Hell!! And if this is true it makes me struggle with why God would do that to me!!! I can’t read the Bible: I just can’t. I know what it says. I believe Jesus was God in the flesh & I never understood that you could lose this gift! We still sin, but we also pay the consequences. Once saved always saved is the truth or how can you believe in a God that strikes you when you get bound up? My daughter was bound up & also my wild child and she died a prodigal. Like Toby says there’s only one reason his wild child prodigal son is in Heaven… Listen to what he says in the introduction of his video 🦋🦋🦋 When I can hear God’s voice and believe it’s Him I believe He’s telling me she was never going to get it together, she was too bound & He took her out of the clutches of the demons and snatched her to Heaven. She was in jail 6 weeks before her 4wheeler accident. I believe in my heart that with all I taught her about Jesus she was crying out to Him. I believe it. But when she got out of jail she went to the old playground. God saved her. He had to take her to save her from the chains of the drug she was so drawn to. The devil has tortured me & I’m done fighting these thoughts. My daughter is with Jesus! My God would not allow me to keep being tortured. But God allowed the devil to make the consequences of my sin painful enough to teach me lessons that cause repentance while my salvation is secure, He never leaves us! God is holding Allison while I’m holding her in my heart ❤️ #NotinVain

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