I asked myself that so many times because I was only 28 when Dustin died. A part of you does when you lose a child. Like part of your soul is gone. Then the struggle to live & losing friends that say they don’t know how to talk to me. The family that doesn’t want you at gatherings because you whine & cry about your child. I lost who I was. I know I was a good person & a good mom before my son died.
A couple of weeks ago I went through a box of old things of mine & found my senior book from high school. I found a note from one of my best friends. I took a screenshot.
She said every time she sees me I’m in a good mood. I always cared about everyone else. Always there when anyone needs me. I didn’t let my problems in life get me down.
I fight for a good mood everyday, especially since losing Allison too. I do let my problems get me down. The rest is still me. Somewhat hindered but me. I will make the best of my mistakes one day soon.